Category Archives: Running

9-17-14 and 9-18-14

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Wednesday, 9-17-14

I met a friend for coffee in the morning after dropping Carlos off to school. This is the mom of a friend of Carlos’ from his old school. I hadn’t seen her all summer so it was great to catch up.

After that I had plans to meet Kate for a long run. It has been so much fun helping her to train for her first half marathon. The summer was really tough for her because of the heat so she scaled back her training. Kate recently mentioned that she was struggling to get her breathing under control so we decided that we would really emphasize breathing this week particularly during the long run. She admitted that she was getting very caught up in her pace/mile and even felt some competition from an acquaintance who just began running.

I think it is so discouraging for new runners to worry about pace. There seems to be a lot of concern about minutes per mile. I had always run alone and was very reluctant to discuss running early on so I really had nothing to compare my time to. There are almost always time goals going into a race, but mine were very personal and private. Running and particularly running races has become much more common. With apps like Map My Run it is easy to view friends’ progress. This can create an unhealthy sense of competition.

To avoid unnecessary stress related to distance and pace we are focusing on overall time running with a goal of working up to a three hour long run before the half marathon. Kate and I ran a very consistent 7.32 miles in 1 hour 42 minutes. The goal was 90 minutes with a slow cool down. Her breathing was in control for most of the run and when it became an issue we took short walk breaks to get it under control. If she continues to train this way I think she is going to exceed her expectations on race day.

For me this is a great opportunity to get back into long runs without any pressure to improve my own time. I am running at Kate’s pace which will also help me to avoid injury during this training. It’s been a fun change running and chatting with a friend. since I’m so accustomed to running alone with music. Honestly the 90 minutes flew by.

Later that afternoon while our boys were at swimming lessons we took advantage of the gorgeous weather to stroll another 2.06 miles around the pond at the college. I’ve been trying to include more walking into my days. I think it’s a great way to include mindful activity that isn’t forced or stressful. I enjoy it alone, but it’s more fun walking and talking with a friend.

Thursday, 9-18-14

I started my morning with a nice 75 minute Vinyasa yoga class. I love yoga and really hope to begin doing it more regularly.

It’s Big E time here in Western Massachusetts! OK I’m not actually that excited about it. The Big E, is said to be the largest fair in the northeast. It opens every September and runs for 17 days. There are buildings dedicated to each of the New England States, Connecticut, Massachusetts, New Hampshire, Maine and Vermont…no New York is not part of New England! The fair showcases agriculture, animals, musical performances, a midway of rides and games and butter. Yup butter! Each year there is a new butter sculpture on display. Go ahead click on the link to see this year’s butter sculpture, you know you want to! There are also parades including a Mardi Gras style parade where you can catch beaded necklaces. There is an old colonial village you can tour. There are horse shows. The Better Living Center is a mecca of goods including my favorite, the Vitamix demonstration.

However, for most people the big attraction is the food. Each year there is something even more disturbingly unhealthy than last year. It’s not exactly a vegan’s dream dining experience. I definitely do not go for the food, but according to friends and family that love “the fair,” I’m weird! Everyone I know that attends the Big E each year goes for some specific treat or two or three. This year it seems that bacon is the most popular item. Bacon ice cream, chocolate dipped bacon, fried dough topped with maple syrup and bacon, and more I’m sure. If you’re a bbq fanatic you might love the pulled pork parfait. It’s all the fixings plus the pulled pork all in one handy dandy cup! And if you’re feeling particularly undernourished or maybe you just ran a marathon go for something deep fried, anything, literally anything you want like an Oreo, banana, Kool Aid (I don’t get it), peanut butter and jelly, cheesecake or butter. Yup butter…deep fried butter! No not your thing? How about the Craz-E Burger, a bacon cheeseburger served between two halves of a grilled glazed donut. Last but not least you absolutely cannot leave the park without eating a famous Big E Cream Puff.

Not exactly a vegan’s dream dining experience. In fact all I ate was a free packet of dried cranberries. I get the whole YOLO (you only live once) mentality, but I’d be concerned about making it out of the Big E alive if I were some of these folks.

 

 

 

9-15-14 and 9-16-14

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Monday, 9-15-14

Because I work nights and don’t sleep until later in the day I basically have my days free to sit on the couch, eat bon bons and watch soap operas to myself now that Carlos is in school full day. Most people are of the opinion that I should sleep during the day, but I’ve only ever done that on rare occasions and I end up sleeping less than I do in the evening. I don’t like it. When Carlos went back to school we decided to just keep things as they were because I felt it worked best for me. However, if Carlos has something important in the evening then I will sleep during the day so I don’t have to miss it.

I have no problem keeping busy and typically have a bunch of things I try to get done each day. One perk of being home during the daytime is that I often get to visit with friends who are also home or I meet other friends on their lunch break from time to time. I encourage meeting up for coffee/tea and then going for a walk or doing some kind of activity to kill two birds with one stone. So on Monday morning my friend Mary picked me up, we grabbed coffees and then walked around Mount Holyoke College gabbing for about an hour and 15 minutes. It was a nice slow stroll as she has knee and back issues.

Back at home I managed to fit in a short body weight strength routine before running (literally) to the library to give blood. The town just built a gorgeous new library almost exactly one mile from my house so I ran there, donated blood and then walked home. The guy manning the snack table was so worried that I would pass out if I ran home he made me promise to walk. I agreed and called my mother on the walk home. It was a positively gorgeous day.

I picked Carlos up from school and went over my friend Kate’s house. The boys wanted to light saber battle before swimming lessons. So we went for a walk to the college while they battled. They settled into their stroke lessons and Kate and I decided to go for another walk around the pond just outside the college’s athletic center. We fit in a little over 2 miles before returning to watch their diving lessons.Carlos is just learning to dive so he’s a little apprehensive. Kate’s son is amazing, dives in like a porpoise with hardly a splash. I love that these kids get out there and give it their all for two hours of lessons!

After swimming the night sped along with dinner, bath and before I knew it I was in bed for a short nap before work.

Tuesday, 9-16-14

Do you ever just feel completely off kilter? Well this was that kind of day. Yoga class was horrible. I was off balance literally and I just felt inadequate and ungraceful. The weather was bitter, grey and dreary in the morning. I came home and sat in front of the space heater which killed me because it’s not even officially fall. I actually managed to get a few financial things done.

Finally I got off my tush and did some body weight strength training. I’m just trying to fit it in when I can, some lunges, squats, ab stuff whenever wherever! The sun came out. I warmed up a bit. So I decided to go for a short run. I ran 3.20 miles in my neighborhood.

I picked up Carlos from school and met my mom at the mall. Carlos went home with her to spend the afternoon. I went home, cleaned up, finished folding laundry and made Carlos’ lunch before going to bed.

It doesn’t sound like a bad day, but I also felt like a black hole when it came to food. I went to bed trying to analyze my chaotic at times eating habits. It’s an uphill battle for me, but I’m determined to win.

I woke up startled thinking I had overslept, but was relieved to see it was only 8:30. I slept for another hour and 15 minutes, got up, showered and got ready for another night of work.

 

And so are the days of my life…

9-10-14 to 9-14-14

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Where do the days go?

Wednesday 9-10-14

I’m starting to get my running mojo back. I decided to run up Mt. Holyoke and then hike my way back down. I ran up the access road to the top rather than the trail because I am still being over cautious about injury. It was an awesome feeling making it to the top. It’s not a huge climb and only about 1.65 miles to the top, but it really gets the heart pumping. I took in the view from the top and then strolled down the trails for a total of 3.15 miles.

Panoramic from the top of Mt. Holyoke

Panoramic from the top of Mt. Holyoke

I practiced a little trail running on flat stretches of trail. It was a leisurely hike down. As I was getting close to my car I greeted an older man who was walking his little furry white dog. The dog was bounding along quite happily. We said hello and then the man informed me that 6 months ago the dog was paralyzed! I said well she’s made a remarkable recovery and now I can tell you all about the dog, the man’s daughter who lives in Maine, his workout schedule, etc. People love to share their stories with me! This summer at our favorite little local lake, Carlos ran into a friend from school. When I walked down the small beach to get him to go home I met his friend’s grandmother and her friend. The grandmother’s friend suddenly began explaining that she was wearing a big floppy beach hat because she was in menopause and taking hormones and didn’t want to get a sunburn. I learned all about her daughter who was a new Chemistry teacher and more about menopause. It’s amazing what people will share!

Later in the afternoon I had a phone call to make and I was doing some computer work at a coffee shop near the bike trail. It was a gorgeous day out so I decided to walk and talk. I was surprised that I ended up walking 4.35 miles. I moved for a total of 7.5 miles.

Thursday 9-11-14

I have been itching to do a long run, something more than 5 miles. I had plans to run with my friend Kate, the one I will be running with in the Baystate Half Marathon next month. However, things didn’t work out quite as planned. I left the house and decided to run in her direction. I ran 4.47 miles before meeting up with her as she got delayed by a couple of unplanned issues. We then did some hill work and a mini boot camp of lunges, squats and tricep dips. The weather was really undecided, it was grey and gloomy, but a bit muggy and breezy. Rain was imminent and of course as we headed back to do more hill work it began raining. We decided to just get back on the road and run to my house. Luckily the rain fizzled out.  I ran another 4.04 miles for a total of 8.51 miles!

Back at my house we indulged in a little homemade facial. I made a face scrub out of almond oil and coconut sugar which smells divine! We cleansed our faces with my new Beauty Counter cleanser and then did the scrub. My skin felt so nice and smooth!

Little known fact…I really wanted to be an esthetician when I was in high school. I used to practice doing facials on my friends and family. I was so interested in it my mom took me to the Elizabeth Grady School in Boston for a tour and informational session. Of course once my friends started looking into colleges I wanted to do the same. I am still interested in skin care, but these days I am more interested in how to care for the skin as naturally as possible by eliminating chemically laden products in exchange for more natural organic remedies. Something tells me at some point my career path might come full circle.

Friday 9-12-14

I have been itching to get back into strength training. I hit the gym after bringing Carlos to school. I didn’t have much time, but managed to fit in a good 45 minute session including a quick warm up on the bike. I am aiming for one day a week at the gym.

Later I met my oldest and dearest childhood friend for lunch. It was a belated birthday lunch for me. It’s always nice to catch up with her as we don’t see each other too often. She is a busy nurse practitioner with 4 sons! She had 3 of her boys long before I had Carlos. As kids we used to talk about how we would live next door to each other in California and have children at the same time. Well by the time I got pregnant with Carlos I figured that dream was long gone. Ironically she got pregnant a few months later with her fourth son. Carlos and Domenic are great friends and although they don’t see each other often they act as though no time has passed when they do get together just like their moms. Now I just have to figure out how we are going to live next door to each other in California!

Saturday 9-13-14

I brought Carlos to soccer practice in the morning and went for a run while he was there. It was a really enjoyable 4.36 mile run. After practice we went home so I could shower. We picked up our farm share, went to Barnes & Noble to pick up a gift card for a birthday party that afternoon and back home for lunch.

The birthday party was for one of Carlos’ new school friends. He loves to dance and takes dance lessons. His mom said he really wanted a dance birthday party so the studio let him have the party there. The two dance instructors spent about a half hour teaching the group of kids a short dance to one of the songs in the most recent Muppets movie. Then the kids performed the dance for us. They had cake and ice cream in the lobby area before going back into the dance room for another performance. The dance instructors put other music on and led the kids in a little freestyle dance party. It was nice to see the boys participating too and having so much fun. My husband is a great dancer and Carlos has inherited the natural rhythm that every Mozambican boy seems to be born with thankfully!

Sunday 9-14-14

I ran 4.40 miles at my happy place, Ashley Reservoir, for a much needed run after work. At home I whipped up my favorite black bean and corn salad for an afternoon barbecue. Carlos had skating at 11:30. At 1:30 all went to the barbecue at the house of one of his class mates later in the afternoon. This new school is very small. There is a strong sense of community. This family invited the entire class over to get to know the families. The teacher and one teaching assistant also came. It was a beautiful afternoon. There was tons of homemade food. The company was enjoyable. It was so nice to chat with everyone, get to know the parents and kids a little better and make ourselves more visible. Carlos is settling in very nicely and we are beyond thrilled with the transformation we have seen in him in the short time he’s been back at school.

We love Montessori and what it is doing for Carlos, but we are quickly becoming aware that not everyone shares our enthusiasm. At soccer practice a boy from Carlos’ old school told him that his mom won’t let him go to Montessori because they let you learn whatever you want to and that’s not right. There have also been a few quips made to me by parents about the lack of structure in a Montessori classroom. I don’t say too much other than to encourage people to visit a Montessori school before criticizing. I tend to preface any discussion about Carlos’ new school with, “Montessori school is not appropriate for all children, but it is a great fit for Carlos.”

So how was your week/weekend?

 

9-6-14 to 9-9-14

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Slow down September!

Saturday, 9-6-14

Remember sleepovers? Well I woke up to the sound of Carlos and his friend Tyler belting out Gangnam Style from the massive fort they made in the living room. It was about 6 a.m.

First order of business was to run to the farm to grab our farm share. It’s a half share and I am able to select my own produce.

 

Farm Share: Napa cabbage, Swiss chard, arugula, summer squash and tomatoes

Farm Share: Napa cabbage, Swiss chard, arugula, summer squash and tomatoes

The boys had a soccer training at 10:45.  It was blazing hot, but they got through it. We met Tyler’s mom and brother for lunch after and then we all went apple picking. It was the very first day of picking at Dickinson’s Farm in neighboring Granby, MA. Here are few photos of our afternoon outing.

The rest of Saturday was unplanned. I helped my friend unpack and organize. They just moved into her mom’s house. I love organizing! It’s much more fun with a friend. I think we got quite a bit accomplished. Carlos and Tyler played zombie hunters for hours. We all ate pizza for dinner and then walked to the town commons for frozen yogurt and coffee. Awesome day!

Sunday 9-7-14

Carlos had his first skating session of the new season. This is his third year in the Learn to Skate program. He can obviously skate by now, but has no interest in playing hockey. He was apprehensive about joining because he said he wouldn’t know anyone since all of his skating buddies moved on to hockey, but said he wanted to do it. Well he was pretty aggravated about going Sunday morning and gave me attitude on the way there. At the end of the lesson he was beaming from ear to ear. He said, “mom the coaches love me. They all remember me and the main coach told me that I could help out with the new skaters. It was awesome!”

I’m so proud of Carlos. He is an only child and often does things alone. I could care less if he ever plays hockey. I think knowing how to ice skate is a great skill on its own. He’s a decent skater. He can maneuver stick and puck thanks to these lessons. The most important thing is that he is out there moving his body, getting a little physical activity and he will most certainly make new skating friends.

I emailed the coach the next day to let him know how his kind words had affected Carlos. I thanked him for the hard work he and all of the coaches put into the program and for instilling confidence in the children. This program is phenomenal. It is extremely well organized. The kids learn quickly, but skills are reinforced each week. It is also a serious bargain at $99. It runs from September through March. At the end the kids are awarded trophies and a certificate. Each Monday we receive an email from the head coach explaining the drills that were taught, information on what is to come in the program and a lot of encouraging words about the progress the kids are making.

Monday 9-8-14

After a busy, eventful night at work I just wanted to run. I didn’t care how long or how far. I simply wanted to run. So I dropped Carlos off at school and took off from there. I’m enjoying new running routes around his new school. It’s in an area I really love and I welcome the change of scenery. It was an absolutely gorgeous day. The sky was clear and it was not too warm.

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I ended up running 5.56 miles at a rather decent pace. This is one of my longest runs since the injury. I felt amazing! I’m excited to start building up my mileage again.

I felt a surge of productivity and dug into to my basement project at last. I started organizing the things I will sell at a tag sale and made a throw away pile. I got quite a bit done for the first day.

Monday afternoon Carlos had swimming lesson at Mount Holyoke College. This is also a fabulous program. It runs three weeks in the fall and three weeks in the spring. It serves as a fundraiser for the swim team. The girls on the team teach the children strokes. Carlos already knew how to swim when he started last fall, but the improvement in his strokes was phenomenal. He is usually with his friend Tyler and one instructor so it’s almost like a private lesson. This session he is also doing diving lessons because he wanted to be able to swim in the “hot tub!” The diving pool is heated. So far he loves the diving lessons too.

Carlos is not a competitive kid. My goal is to expose him to a little bit of everything without putting any pressure on him. This fall he is doing ice skating on Sundays, swimming for three weeks and he is playing on a local in-town soccer team with his friends. These are all things he enjoys doing. I want him to stay active, but at the same time I want him to have fun while learning new skills.

Tuesday, 9-9-14 

I had coffee with a nurse friend. We actually never worked together, but I got to know her a little bit when I trained on the cardiac unit. She is no longer working at the same hospital, but we are friends on Facebook and have very similar interests particularly in places we travel. She is a wonderful nurse, very intelligent and dedicated. She is going through a transition in her career and I am beginning to think about transitioning out of the hospital myself. It was nice to chat with her about nursing and pick her brain on different things I should think about.

In the evening Orlando and I went to Back to School Night at Carlos’ new school. I’m even more certain that we made the right decision to send Carlos to a Montessori school. It was a tremendously informative event. I learned so much about what Carlos does each day. It is a very interesting environment that promotes learning, respect, kindness, cooperation and independence. Carlos is still loving his school days. He anxiously awaits Mondays during the weekend!

Since my mom was babysitting for Carlos we took advantage of the opportunity to go out to dinner afterwards. Orlando and I haven’t had a date in ages. We went across the street to a local favorite, Mission Cantina. The laid back atmosphere inside is no indication of the fabulous food. The guacamole was perfect. My request for a vegan friendly dish was easily accommodated and I was treated to delicious grilled vegetable enchiladas verdes. Orlando went with the traditional chicken molé. It was nice to sit back and catch up a bit.

9/2/14

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I’m off to a great start today. I dropped Carlos off at school. I vacuumed my car and cleaned the inside. There is just something refreshing about a clean car. Then I ran to Trader Joe’s for a few things to complete my grocery list for the week. I planned my route accordingly so I could run on a bike trail near Trader Joe’s. It was almost 9 o’clock by the time I got there and it was already hot and humid. I’m waiting for you fall!

I hit the trail for a 4 mile run and I felt amazing. My legs were finally acting they knew what to do. My breathing felt great. I ran along at what felt like a slightly speedier pace than what I’ve been running and smiled the entire way. It was an awesome run. After that I browsed around Bed Bath and Beyond for some toiletry organizers. Boy is it easy to lose track of time in there! I found a few things, drove home and immediately threw two pots of water on the stove, one for quinoa, the other for brown rice. I just zipped off a couple of emails and now I’m writing this post.

Today is Carlos’ first full day of school. He had two half days last week to get acclimated which was helpful as he transferred to a new school for 2nd grade. Last winter it became apparent that Carlos needed a different learning environment. I had decided that if we were unable to find another school to meet his needs then I would home school. Prior to becoming a nurse I was a teacher. I was confident that I could learn the ropes of home schooling and reignite Carlos’ love of learning.

Carlos is inquisitive. He loves to explore a variety of subjects. He learns quickly and retains an astonishing amount of information. He is imaginative and creative. He reads at an advanced level. He is bright, not brilliant or a genius, but clearly intelligent. Education is very important in our home. As first grade progressed he was coming home increasingly more frustrated. He finally said what I had suspected, “I’m bored.” I think I’m to blame in part. Whenever Carlos gets interested in something we allow him to explore it in depth. For example he had fascination with Benedict Arnold last fall. We found documentary type videos, stories geared toward children and historical facts. He soaked it up and that led to more questions about the Revolutionary War, George Washington, etc. We found answers to his questions if we didn’t know the answers.

His boredom was compounded by the fact that his school had limited facilities for indoor gym and recess which only led to more aggravation during the long cold winter. The outdoor playground was a parking lot and by the year’s end kids were so restricted that they could simply walk around and talk to each other. Kids need to run and play during the day. The kids were discouraged from taking books out of the school library. Spanish class was little more than coloring and watching movies in English (yes that’s right!). Despite a small class of only 13 students the teacher told me personally that they were a difficult group to manage. Carlos began coming home with headaches because of the constant yelling his teacher was doing to discipline the class. I’ve known these kids for the last four years and I find it very hard to believe that an experienced first grade teacher would have any trouble laying down the law from day one. Her major complaint was that the kids talked too much. I’m sure Carlos did his share of talking, but he was not a behavioral problem. Carlos’ teacher abruptly retired at the end of the school year prompting thoughts that perhaps she had some personal issues going on which made it difficult for her at school.

By February I began exploring other options and after visiting a Montessori school I knew immediately that Carlos would be a perfect fit for the school. Carlos spent the day at the school back in June and loved it. He was beaming when I picked him up and wanted to go back the next day. The feedback we received about his visit was so encouraging and made it an easy decision. Carlos acknowledged that although he would miss his friends he really wanted to attend Montessori in the fall. This was a positive sign that we were making the right decision.

Last Thursday he was quiet on the way to school. He was excited, but appropriately nervous. I walked him to the play area where they spend the first 15 minutes before heading into the building and I waited until he found another boy his age. He turned and said goodbye, gave me a quick hug and off he went.

I couldn’t wait to pick him up that day. I saw the director of admissions when I got to the school and she told me that she had seen Carlos midday and he told her it was the best school day ever!! Carlos got in the car shortly after and was a bundle of excited energy. He talked nonstop on the way home about his day. This, in and of itself, was a miracle because most days over the last year he would simply grunt “fine” in reply to my question “how was your day?”

Carlos couldn’t wait to go to school on Friday. It was another great day. Carlos even said to me this weekend, “I wish there were no weekends now so I could go to school everyday!”

So what is so magical about this new school. Well these are the things Carlos loves the most:

  • When you are finished with your assignment you move on to something else.
  • If you have to go to the bathroom you are allowed to go without asking the teacher.
  • Snack is provided by the school and children are able to eat it when they are hungry rather than all together at a designated time.
  • The playground is amazing!
  • No assigned seating, no desks and the freedom to move around the classroom.
  • Mali, the school dog.

Things I love the most:

  • The huge smile on Carlos’ face when he talks about school.
  • The environment. The school is newly built and looks like a large home. It’s calm, bright, clean and inviting.
  • The school’s commitment to giving back to the community.
  • That independence is valued and children learn to problem solve.

Prior to this experience I knew very little about Montessori, but I’ve since read a bit about Dr. Maria Montessori. Her story alone is fascinating. What drew me towards a Montessori school for Carlos is that it encompasses the whole person. Montessori is much more a way of life than an educational philosophy. Dr. Montessori developed her program through observation of young children. Though the children operate with a certain sense of independence it is within an environment specially designed for them and prepared to meet them where they are at individually.

Some think of Montessori and think disorder, but actually it is quite the opposite. Children learn that everything has a place and they are taught to respect and care for their environment. In my brief time at the school I witnessed a rhythmic flow of activity where the children seemed to know what they needed to do without being told. There was peace, quiet and calm. Carlos’ teacher, known as a guide, is genuinely kind, caring and clearly enjoys what she is doing. She is soft spoken yet in a very understated manner she is in control of her classroom. There is a mutual respect throughout the school.

A Montessori school may not serve well for every child though I am inclined to believe that some of the principles might just be worth giving a try in mainstream classrooms.

“Education is a natural process carried out by the child and is not acquired by listening to words but by experiences in the environment.” Dr. Maria Montessori

9/1/14

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New month. Carlos is officially back to school. Time to get back on track. No back pedaling. No looking in the rear views mirror of life. No regrets. What’s done is done. I’m future focused and excited for the month ahead.

Three things I’m thankful for:

  • My good health
  • A healed Achilles
  • My son’s renewed enthusiasm for school

Thought of the day:

“Sometimes life knocks you on your ass… get up, get up, get up!!! Happiness is not the absence of problems, it’s the ability to deal with them.” Steve Maraboli (click on Steve’s name to read a fitting post if you are determined to move forward starting now)

What’s making me happy today:

An early run after work at my happy place.

Looking forward to spending this Labor Day with my husband and son.

Getting organized for the week ahead

Carlos and I bagged snacks and filled containers with applesauce and yogurt for school lunch.

I wrote out a weekly meal plan for dinners and a grocery list.

I have a workout plan for the week that includes some running, strength and yoga.

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With that said I think it’s time to mention running again. Without going backwards I will just say that my Achilles took almost 3 months to heal. When I finally started running again in mid-July my runs were slow and short. My busy summer schedule made it challenging to find time to run long enough to train for the Vermont 50 Ultramarathon I had signed up to run at the end of September. Still I clung to the hope that somehow I might be able to muddle through. Deep down I knew the timing was wrong. The Vermont City marathon at the end of May was intended to be the halfway point of my ultra marathon training.  Then from there I was to build up my mileage, endurance and tweak my nutrition for the course.  As August began to fly by with little increase in my mileage I finally accepted that running an ultra marathon post injury with incomplete training was not only dangerous, but also very unwise. I would never advise a fellow runner to go through with it so why did I think I should attempt it? Pride. Fear of feeling like a failure. Frustration.

The exact moment I made the decision to drop out of the Vermont 50, I felt an enormous sense of relief. The next day I went for a run. No headphones, no Garmin, no Map My Run, no watch. It was freeing. I ran slowly and comfortably. I focused on keeping my breathing even and unlabored. I ran only as long as I wanted to and stopped when I didn’t feel like running anymore with no concern about pace, time or mileage.

I’ve been going along like this for a couple of weeks and it’s just what I need to get myself back into running. It is the first time since I began running that I have run simply because I love to run and not because I’m training for something. However, I miss training. I miss the schedule, preparing for a race off in the distance and having a goal, but I’m not quite ready to set my sights on anything to daunting.

My next running goal is actually not about me at all. It’s about my friend Kate. On October 19, 2014 I will be running the Baystate Half Marathon alongside Kate as she completes her first half marathon. I am going to train with her over the next 6 weeks. On top of running we have also been meeting once a week for a boot camp style workout where we do a variety of strength training and core strengthening exercises.

Kate has an awesome story to tell and I’m hoping she’ll let me share it here. I’m super excited for her. I think this is going to be an unforgettable experience for us both. The truth is, I am starting all over again only this time with the knowledge I’ve gained from all the miles I’ve run over the last 5 years. There’s no looking back…

 

The road ahead

My eyes are on the road ahead

 

 

Australian adventure: Day 1

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We finally landed in Sydney on Sunday, July 20th. As we neared the airport we were treated to a view of the famous sights of Sydney’s harbor, the Opera House and the Sydney Harbor Bridge. We got to our hotel, the Westin Sydney, in the early afternoon.

View from our hotel room in Sydney

View from our hotel room in Sydney

We were traveling with my sister who was there on business so we dropped our bags and left her to catch up on email and other important business.  It was an overcast cool day, but a great day for walking. So without a plan we just headed in the direction of the harbor. The hotel was very centrally located and only a 10 minute walk to the harbor.

My first impression of Sydney was that it was your typical big city. It was clean and I loved the look of some of the buildings. I found out later that many of the buildings are made from sand stone which was found in abundance in this area.

 

Once down at the harbor I stood for minutes just taking in the view. There were tears in my eyes as I realized that this was a 30 year old dream come true. The bridge and Opera House are more spectacular in person than I imagined. Although we would see the harbor multiple times daily during our stay the feeling I got looking at it never grew old.

Cloudy skies over the Sydney Harbor Bridge

Cloudy skies over the Sydney Harbor Bridge

 

Walking towards the Opera House

Walking towards the Opera House

Even on a cool grey overcast day the harbor was a beautiful sight to see.

The Sydney Harbor BridgeThe Sydney Harbor Bridge

The Sydney Harbor BridgeThe Sydney Harbor Bridge

We walked around for a while, watched some Aborginal street performers playing the didgeridoo, checked out the colorful boomerangs, grabbed a handful of pamphlets advertising the many tourist attractions, took tons of similar photos, booked a tour of the Opera House and stopped for a quick lunch.

 

Boomerangs

Boomerangs

Didgeridoo

Didgeridoo

After lunch we went to the Opera House for an hour long tour. The tour was $37 for adults and $20 for children. If you are traveling to Sydney it’s good to know that many attractions can be booked online and will offer a 10% discount. I had my phone with me, but could only use it on WiFi so we were unable to access the discount.

The Sydney Opera House was built from 1957 to 1973. This architectural masterpiece was the brainchild of Jorn Utzon from Denmark though he resigned from the project in 1966 and was replaced by Peter Hall. The distinctive roof of the Opera House is said to resemble the sails of a sail boat. Life certainly does revolve around the water there so it is fitting that the architecture would somehow be tied to the sea. The Opera House has various spaces including the Concert Hall, the Joan Sutherland Theatre, the Drama Theatre, the Playhouse, the Studio, the Utzon Room and the Recording Studio.

My photos don’t do the building justice. You are not able to take photos in the concert halls. We saw the hall where Don Giovanni would be playing later that night. We also saw another hall that was set up and just getting ready for rehearsal.

After our tour of the Opera House we made our way back to the hotel, did some exploring around the hotel, went for a swim in the cold “heated” hotel pool and then decided to pass on dinner because we were both exhausted. Not bad for our first day down under!!

Fiji

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Bula bula!

That’s Fijian for hello.

I returned yesterday from down under. There is so much to write about, but quite possibly one of the best parts of the trip was the first part of our trip, our layover in Fiji. After a 5 hour flight from Boston to LA and an 11.5 hour flight from LA to Fiji we had the great fortune to be able to spend a full day and night on Fiji’s Denarau Island.

I was immediately enamored by the friendly faces and warm bula bula greetings from everyone from the moment we landed in Fiji. We arrived at The Westin Denarau Island Resort in the early morning hours on Saturday, July 21st. We essentially lost a day having crossed the International Date Line hours earlier. Since it was so early our room was not ready yet, but while it was being prepared we explored the property, took a walk on the beach and enjoyed the breakfast buffet. Before we even got to our room Carlos was already known by the exceptionally kind staff who shook his hand, hugged him and gave him high fives.

The sun was heating up the day and Carlos was itching to go swimming so as soon as our bags were brought up to our room we all changed into our bathing suits and headed back to the pool and the beach. We lounged, walked along the beach and swam. It was a such a relaxing day.

A room with a view

A room with a view

 

One of many swimming pools

One of many swimming pools

 

Sparkling swimming pools

Sparkling swimming pools

 

Beach boy

Beach boy

 

Carlos and my sister happened to find a kids club at the neighboring Sheraton Resort just down the path and he begged to spend the afternoon there. He did something similar in the Bahamas so I think he knew what to expect. Sure enough he had a fabulous time and made new friends while my sister and I chilled out with some tropical fruit and chatted.

By the time we returned to the room to prepare for dinner the sun was beginning to set. My photos do not do justice to the spectacular sight of a Fijian sunset.

Start of a Fijian sunset

Start of a Fijian sunset

Sunset in action

Sunset in action

For dinner we attended a luau type show and buffet at our hotel. It was touristy, but given our short time there it was perfect. The show told tales of the Fijian culture, performers demonstrated fire walking and we enjoyed a Meke Lovo Fijian feast. The food was delicious and there were so many vegetable, fruit and salad options.

Carlos and one of the performers IMG_3605 IMG_3606

Carlos was practically falling asleep at the dinner table he was so tired from the busy day so we left a bit early to get to bed before our early 4:30am wake up call. Our flight to Sydney was scheduled to depart at 7am so we were instructed to take a taxi from the hotel at 5am. We arrived to the airport with plenty of time to check in for our last leg of the journey.

Fiji airport at sunrise

Fiji airport at sunrise

A quick pic before boarding

A quick pic before boarding

I can’t wait to return to Fiji someday to explore more of the over 300 islands that make up the island nation. I would love to go snorkeling, take a cruise out to other islands, go kayaking, learn more about Fijian culture and mostly just relax on the beach with a coconut drink in my hand while the sun sets. My husband would absolutely love Fiji. The people reminded me a lot of the Mozambican people, happy, smiling and genuinely nice.

Vinaka (thank you) Fiji, until next time.

TMI Survey

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I recently saw this survey floating around and decided to answer the questions. In other news I have big travel plans for July and a big race to train for. My Achilles is on the mend and I’m running comfortably for about 45-60 minutes. I’m taking it very slowly and listening to my body. Summer vacation is in full swing and we have already put our Six Flags season’s passes to good use. Carlos got his report card in the mail yesterday and I’m very proud of his straight A+s. He is on his way to 2nd grade in the fall!

Here’s a little TMI about me:

1. What are you wearing?

Black scrub pants, a navy blue long sleeved tee and sneakers aka my work uniform.

2. Ever been in love?

Yes.

3. Ever had a terrible breakup?

Yes. My first real boyfriend cheated on me. I was 16 years old and madly in love for all the wrong reasons. This broke my heart at the time. We lost touch not long after and years later after returning home from the Peace Corps I found out from a run in with an old friend of his that he had been involved in a serious single car crash and was paralyzed from the waist down. He was a bit of a “bad boy” when we dated as teens so I wasn’t surprised to learn that he had been driving over 90mph in an attempt to get away from a police car that was chasing him. Ironically last year on Easter he found me on Facebook and tried to friend me. He sent me a message detailing what he’s been up to for the last 25 years. He was remorseful for the way he treated me and stated that he wouldn’t be surprised if I hated him. I was surprised by this because he never struck me as the “feeling” type. After sharing the message with my husband I sent a brief message back to let him know that I certainly didn’t harbor any resentment. Deep in my teen aged heart I knew it wouldn’t have worked out anyway. I never accepted his friend request and haven’t heard from him since.

4. How tall are you?

5’3″

5. How much do you weigh?

Seriously?!! OK fine. This has been a huge point of stress, depression, contention and frustration for me since last fall. My goal weight is somewhere in the 130s. For the better part of the first 8 months of last year I stayed consistently in the 145-149 range. Then after the Montreal Marathon I endured the post marathon weight gain and went up to about 154. I stabilized and have been happily and unhappily maintaining at 150 ever since the fall. Last time I weighed myself I was 150.8.

Maintenance is a challenge in and of itself. I continue to journal my food, workout and eat healthy, however, I have struggled with emotional eating and body image issues over the last 10 months. Despite my weight I can clearly see positive changes in the shape of my body. I am not giving up the fight. It’s not the number I am necessarily striving for, it’s a feeling in my clothing, a sense of lightness and an overall contentment with my body.

6. Any tattoos?

Yes, one tattoo on the right side of my waist. It’s a lizard with an Egyptian ankh (key of life) symbol down it’s back. Don’t ask. I’m pretty sure it had some deep significance back in 1997 or 98 (can’t remember) when I got it. I was young and foolish, but at least had sense enough to locate the tattoo in a place that is never revealed to the public. I actually don’t really think about it. Of course I regret it, but not enough to dwell on it or spend the money to have it removed.

7. Any piercings?

I have four piercings in my left ear, one of which is in the top cartilage, a helix piercing I believe, and two in my right ear. However, I wear the same faux diamond studs, one in each ear, every single day.

8. Favorite song?

The Monster by Eminem featuring Rihanna. It’s a little edgy and great to run to.

9. Quality you look for in a partner?

Kindess

10. Favorite quote?

“Whether you think you can, or you think you can’t–you’re right.” Henry Ford

I spent the better part of the last 35+ years being a very negative person. Changing my attitude hasn’t always been easy, but the outcomes of a positive attitude are worth their weight in gold.

11. Favorite actor?

I don’t really have a favorite actor or actress, but right now I think Kerry Washington in Scandal is fantastic.

12. Loud music or soft?

Loud while driving alone and sometimes when running off road or working out at the gym. Soft when running on the road.

13. Where do you go when you’re sad?

I go for a run at the reservoir.

14. How long does it take you to get ready in the morning?

Last night I woke up for work late. I took a shower and made myself presentable in about 15 minutes flat. If I have to wash my hair, which I can’t do everyday unless it gets sweaty because it becomes too dry, then it takes me about 35 minutes. I’m fairly low maintenance. If it takes me a while to get ready it’s because I’m multi-tasking.

15. Ever been in a physical fight?

Not really, just wrestling with my sister as kids.

16. Turn on?

A nice smile complete with great teeth

17. Turn off?

Big egos, know-it-alls, loud chewing/crunching, basic grammar and spelling errors

18. Fears?

Dying, not seeing Carlos grow up, the state of the world most days

19. Last thing that made you cry?

Active release therapy on my Achilles

20. Last time you said you loved someone?

Last night I said I love you to Orlando before I left for work.

21. Meaning behind your YouTube name?

It’s my gmail account.

22. The relationship between you and the last person you texted?

Husband

23. Favorite food?

Mexican, particularly guacamole

24. Place you want to visit?

Anywhere I have never visited. Honestly I would go anywhere.

25. Do you have a crush?

Yes on my husband (shhh!)

26. Last time you kissed someone?

I kissed my husband good night before I left for work.

27. Last time you were insulted?

I am going through a strange situation with a “friend” who has been on my case for a couple of months. She often makes rude, insulting comments to me. She talks about me behind my back. It’s all very high school. I keep trying to back away from the relationship quietly without any drama, but she is relentless at times with texts and phone calls.

28. Favorite piece of jewelry?

My “engagement” ring. It’s a small round single diamond on a very thin, simple white gold band. My husband actually gave it to me after I gave birth to Carlos. We got married in 2001 in Mozambique. We were saving our pennies to relocate to the United States and had very little money. An engagement ring was out of the question. I was fine with it and never expected it from Orlando anyway. Receiving the diamond ring so many years later actually meant more to me. It is exactly as I would have wanted, unassuming and modest. I really love this ring.

Redefined

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My relationship with food has been dysfunctional for as long as I can remember. This injury has forced me to realize that my relationship with running borders on disordered behavior too. I believe things happen for a reason and if anything good came from this experience it is that my relationship with fitness and food has been positively redefined by this injury.

Initially I took up running to help me lose weight after having my son in December 2006. The weight didn’t fall off like I’ve heard from others, but gradually over the course of the next 6 years I lost about 75 pounds. For the past 2 years I’ve bounced up and down about 5 pounds depending on where I’m at in my race training. Sadly endurance training does not translate into weight loss for me. It actually causes weight gain usually near the end. The truth is, running a lot makes me hungry!

I have found that over the last couple of years training for long races has essentially helped me to maintain my weight. Though the food I was eating got healthier and less processed, my eating behaviors hadn’t drastically changed. You can overeat on fruit, vegetables and nut butters! There really is such a thing as too much of a good thing.

In the back of my head has been a nagging fear. I worried that if I couldn’t run the weight would come pouring back on me. When I stopped running in late April I knew I would have to pay close attention to what I was eating. The injury has consumed my life and most of my time was spent tending to my foot. If I wasn’t cautious I knew I would start gaining weight quickly.

Almost immediately the scale jumped up a couple of pounds and within a couple of weeks my weight reached a number that was simply unacceptable. When I tell you I gain weight by looking at food it’s no joke. Weight loss for me is a very slow and challenging process, but weight gain is effortless and instantaneous. I began weighing myself every few days to keep things in check. I jumped back into diligent food tracking either on my fitness pal or in a paper journal. I began weighing and measuring my food more consistently.

My weight reached its highest in over two years, but then it came back down to the weight I’ve been at since last fall. It’s not my ideal weight, but I’m healthy and energetic. I have about 15 pounds to lose to be within my “goal” weight range.

Years ago a setback like this would have definitely resulted in a massive weight gain. This injury taught me a very valuable lesson. I don’t need running to maintain my weight. The cat is out of the bag…it is not really the running that’s been keeping my weight in check, it’s the habit I’ve created to move my body everyday. Just because I couldn’t run didn’t mean I couldn’t move. I swam, water jogged, did yoga and lots of strength training. Instead of wasting more of my precious time going to and from the gym I learned how to strength train at home using little more than my 5 pound dumbbells, a 20 pound Kettlebell, a yoga mat and an exercise band. For the first time in my life I’m doing real push-ups! I can hold planks longer each time and my yoga balancing poses are getting stronger. I am excited to start running again. I’ve missed it so much, but I’m also really motivated to keep up with the new workouts.

I have issues with food and running from them isn’t going to resolve them. I’ve made great progress in overcoming the issues that kept me obese for so long. Being injured forced me to face the food demons head on. Each time I confront my relationship with food it loses some power over me. I hope to someday be in complete control of food. I am a work in progress.

In the midst of all of this I’ve had some interesting conversations with Carlos lately about nutrition. A couple of weeks ago at his school carnival kids could win a large bag of chips or 2 liter of soda. I just gagged a little writing that and I’m furious about it, but I’m told this is tradition and the kids love it?! I could write an entire post about this, but my point in mentioning it here is that I made the analogy that our body is like a castle and we are the king or queen of the castle. Do we really want to let harmful things inside our castle? If I’m advocating for Carlos to give his body the royal treatment then why shouldn’t I do the same?

“Take care of your body. It’s the only place you have to live.” Jim Rohn