I’m taking a much needed 5 minute break from the 2 chapters of Delivering Health Care in America I have to finish by tonight. To say I am overwhelmed is an understatement. In my first week of grad school I have completed two assignments, read more than I have in months, and became reacquainted with APA format. In my first few years of undergrad many moons we used MLA to cite references. In my last year we were required to use APA. I haven’t written a paper with references since 1996! I am rusty to say the least.

The general format of the class requires us to post our assignment on a discussion board by Wednesday. The assignment must be completed in APA format. Once posted we have to comment on two other posts by Saturday using a well thought out, researched reply with references. There will be a couple of group projects and a final paper. I truly do not have enough hours in the day to complete the reading required to keep up with the class.

The professor seems kind. She is demanding, but very available and offers insightful feedback. Her responses are prompt and she encourages us to reach out to her. My classmates have a variety of experiences and interesting backgrounds. Although we will never meet face to face they seem very open to communicating and helping each other.

Despite one mini breakdown this week I am not throwing in the towel yet! I had a little internal heart to heart on my extremely boring 18 mile run today. I am going to do the best I can and learn as much as I can during this experience. I love learning, but I also have always felt a sense of inadequacy in everything I do as if I’m never good enough or smart enough. Just today someone asked me if I was even an RN. She didn’t understand how I could be in a Master’s program if I was an LPN. I am a registered nurse.  I know that part of my desire to obtain a Master’s Degree is to lend legitimacy to my role as a nurse and an educator.

Carlos had an excellent first week back at school. He really loves his new teacher. His class has only 8 children which is fantastic. I managed to have a successful week of marathon training. Today was my long run. To save time I decided to just run from home instead of driving somewhere for a change of scenery. Unfortunately both of my running partners were out of commission, one is injured, and the other has been sick. I could not have chosen a more mundane, ugly route! Needless to say the 18 miles did not fly by, but I got them done. I stopped in to a McDonald’s for water at mile 10 and the staff there could not have been more friendly. They allowed me to refill my water pack for free. A couple of elderly women were absolutely fascinated by my CamelBak and asked to look at it, see how it worked, and wanted to know where to buy to use on their walks! I get antsy sometimes during a long run and just want to finish it, but I am reminded that I am also doing this to set a healthy example to others. I try to smile when I run so I don’t give the impression that running is really awful, and I am always happy to chat for a few minutes.

I suppose I should get back to reading. It’s not the most captivating reading!

2 thoughts on “Rusty

  1. Aimee….if you EVER need to vent (via text or in person!) please know that you can!! You are undertaking a huge new endeavor that will test you in more ways than you can think of. Just thinking of all you will be doing seems overwhelming to me and I’m not even doing it!! But first of all…don’t EVER let anyone make you feel like you are less than AWESOME…you are one of the BEST nurses and people that I know. This degree will only accentuate what I already know. As far as grad school goes…remember, NO ONE will ever know what your grades are…just get through it. Even if you don’t get all the reading done…who cares!!! As long as you have done enough to do your assignment and make comments on others online…that’s it. Don’t kill yourself with aiming towards perfection. It is always unattainable and will make you feel like nothing if that is your only goal. Sorry to go on and on…but seriously school can make you feel like crap. Just get through it. And remember, I’m only a text away…even if it is only for a complaint 🙂 And also remember…if you ever just want a SHORT visit and a glass of wine and some laughs…we are here for you!

  2. I am finally catching up on my blog reading! Just read your last few posts, and it not only sounds like you’ve had a great summer, but I am SO proud of you for deciding to go back to school. You are smart enough and I know you will do great, even while trying to do everything else you do.

    So excited we’ll meet in real life soon too! And happy belated birthday – 43 is young! 😀

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