I spent last weekend in Florida for my sister’s wedding. Before I go on I’ll share a little bit about the wedding. It was quite an event held at the elegant National Hotel on South Beach. The ceremony took place overlooking the pool with the a view of the ocean in the other direction. It was an extravagant affair paying homage to the art deco era of times past. My sister was a beautiful bride. I was the matron of honor and my son was the most dashing ring bearer. He also stole the show on the dance floor later that night.
I was spoiled with warm sunny runs even as early as 6:30 in the morning. It felt so nice, but it was a tease. We returned home to more snow and it is coming down again. Winter is sucking the life out of me as well as the motivation to run, but I had to make a decision by today whether or not I was going to run the Vermont City Marathon at the end of May. I typically train for 16 weeks for a full marathon. It is what I have successfully done for 3 previous marathons. It gives me a little cushion of time and allows me to make the most of my long runs.
I have exactly 14 weeks to train this time. I have been running for the last few weeks consistently, but without a real training plan. I have been having a really difficult time committing to this race. I know I’m hesitant in part because of the Achilles injury. I feel fine, but I also don’t want to re-injure it. In all honesty, the real reason I have been holding back is because I’m slower now after the injury. I was so proud of my progress in my last full marathon in September 2013. That entire year was amazing. I set PRs at nearly every race. Now I feel like I’m starting all over again as a new runner.
I guess in a way I am starting over. I’m not the same runner I was before the injury. I’m having a very difficult time coming to terms with this. I feel like a failure in a way. Even when I push myself to run hard I’m not coming close to the pace I was capable of sustaining for long periods of time. This is frustrating.
After thinking about it intently I have decided to run Vermont City. I am craving the structure of a training plan. I want to run another marathon this year and after dropping out of Vermont City last year I want it to be the marathon I run. I need to deal with the fact that I don’t run the same. I have to refresh my mindset about why I run…I run because it makes me feel good; I run to clear my mind of all the clutter that builds up; I run for fresh air; I run because I love to run. I want to run for a long time and so if running safely, without injury means slowing down then I have to be ok with that. I’m working on being ok with it.
On Sunday, May 24th I will set a new PR at the Vermont City Marathon. It will be my post-Achilles injury marathon PR!! My clock has reset itself and from here on in I am looking ahead.
Today I ran my first official long run. I ran 8 miles before the snow started. It was a little cold to start and the roads were gross, full of slush. It is going to be a challenging training with this weather, but I’m excited to start and to work towards a successful, injury free marathon.